General Asshole


Yesterday, I was working a gig for a little extra cash to go along with my unpaid internship status. I go with a teen tour as a supervisor out to Alcatraz to meet the minimum number of adult leaders the groups need to visit. It’s not a lot, $100 for a few hours work and it was my 4th time on the trip so I’m pretty use to the routine. This time though, I ran across someone that reminded me of the blog and tall people in general.

It was this tall kid who was being a huge douche to everyone. I was told that on the trip he was the most troublesome as he was saying all sort of negative things to the girls, making general mischief and at one point I had to reprimand him on the island (the first time I’ve done that on a trip) for doing pull ups on the 2nd tier on D block. (I know, not a huge deal, but the park rangers don’t dick around out there as the island is deteriorating all the time and they don’t want anyone to get hurt.

This kid, 6’1″ at 15 an the tallest on the trip, reminded me of what I like to call “General Asshole”. These are guys who use their hugeness to basically be giant d-bags and try to get away with whatever they want. I’ve run into them before and they make me sad for tall people the world over. They man handle women, are rude to people and are an asshole in general.

I know that sounds like a every other douche bag you’ve met, the difference here is that because of the height fewer people are willing to even say a word to get them to stop. Even me.

I was at a party a while back where I ran into another guy, this one 6’8″ tall. Not a huge difference between us, but we were the tallest guys in the room by about 6″ or more so we did the whole ‘tall nod’ and talked for a few minutes. (“The Tall Book” is right. It’s impossible to go to a party, see another 99%-tile guy and not end up atleast chatting for a few minutes.) I could tell he was kind of a dick, using his height to push people around more than is acceptable. Later on that night, he ended up getting trashed and attempting to dance with other people in the kitchen. He knocked someone down, didn’t really care and was a General Asshole. Did I say or do anything? No. I prefer to avoid fights whenever possible as they seem to solve nothing. Plus, the hostess didn’t seem to care (who wasn’t even a friend of mine) and I wasn’t about to start something at a strangers party with a friend of theirs.

Here is the point I’d like to make: Just cause we can push people around, doesn’t mean we should. As I said to one of the counselors on the trip, “People like that make us all look bad.”

Please, only use your height for good. An example from my life: Yesterday, after the trip, I was taking the escalator up and some punk kid was blocking the left side where people walk up as opposed to just standing there. A lady asked him to move so she could pass, to which he said something snide and didn’t really move only letting her barely squeeze past as he said something about how she was a bitch. So when I went to walk past, I put finger to my mouth and “shhhh”-ed, said shut up, and knocked him out of the way.

Moral of the story: Don’t be a dick to a giant, but also, don’t be a giant dick.

PS: Why “General Asshole” as opposed to “Major Asshole”. We’re talking giants here people. We’re the Generals of society. 😉

*POSTING NEWS*: Because I love it and it deserves it, beginning next week I’m going to do a count down of my 5 coolest things I learned from reading “The Tall Book”. See you all next week.

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