Dear Tall Men (Where are you?)

I have a t-shirt just like this, it’s part of my dating criteria.

An update on this thing that is sometimes referred to as ‘Dating’:

I’ve been on Match.com for a little over 3 months searching for my other half and I have to admit, I’m sorely disappointed. I know I said I was going to have low expectations and high hopes and I really tried, but I couldn’t help but get excited every time I saw an email from a member of Match. My hopes were dashed each time. My entire life, height has never been an issue when I’ve dated. I’ve never cared about the height of the past men I’ve dated because I don’t want to miss out on a great personality. But this time I decided that I want to date ‘up’. I decided this because my last boyfriend was my height and I have to admit, I loved it. I want that again and unless some guy completely wows me, I need someone close to my height.

I’ve had 67 winks, 28 emails, 14 guys have favorited me, and my profile has been viewed over 600 times.  Setting aside the couple of guys who emailed me and I consider them to be friends, not a single guy has caught my eye.  At first I thought some of the guys were kidding around when I got an email from them and saw their profile.  But, I sent emails back just to be nice (most of the time).  And when I say kidding around, what I mean is they had profile pictures that they had obviously taken themselves either in the bathroom by a mirror or without a shirt on.  Very unprofessional.  But I tried.  I thought, “Hey, he’s probably really funny”.  Well, I’m here to tell you that they weren’t funny.  They were serious and a couple of them didn’t have jobs, or ambition, or a sense of humor and were actually quite disgusting.  Total flop.

I even emailed back the guys that obviously couldn’t read my requirements and were only 5’10” or 5’11”  Again, my mistake.  Wow.  I’d like to say what a total error this entire Match.com experiment was but I’m trying to remain positive.  It’s a delayed success.  Obviously I’m not meant to find my match, on Match.

Now on the other hand, I can’t expect the guys to do all the work so I probably should’ve emailed or winked at more guys than what I did.  I’ll admit, I only reached out to 5 guys.  None responded.  None.  Not a very big boost to my ego.

I’m not sure why, but this picture seems to be the perfect picture to insert right about now.  Please note the butcher knife in my head.

Back to square one.  Well, kind of.  I guess you could say I didn’t really start out at a square at all.  I’m trying and I guess that’s the hard part.  One step at a time.

I caught a lot of flak for this the last time I posted about it.  The height thing that is. That’s okay, I’m a big girl and I can handle outside opinions.  But I’ll tell you, it’s what I want. I’m looking for a TALL GUY!!!  While I appreciate the opinions, I’ve had 39 years to figure this stuff out.  So (cute, fun, hilarious, etc) Tall Boys….come out of the wood work!!!  I’m waiting….

An update:  I’m adding on one more paragraph because the one thing I didn’t mention in this whole article is my height.  For those newbies that may not know, I’m 6’4″.

A Tall Girl’s attempt at Dating (in a short world)

Let me start out by saying that I strongly dislike being single.  My last relationship was 4 1/2 years and I miss being part of a couple.  I like the partnership, the fun, the giggles, the ability to do things together: movies, dinners, snuggling, anything really.  I had thought this last one was forever but I guess you both need to want the same things, right?  So here I am starting over and trying to figure it all out, once again.

I’m searching for Mr. Right…

Which brings me to the how.  How do you meet people?  I’m 39.  When I was in college you met people…in college.  In classes, at the bar, at the library.  People were everywhere!  Now if I go anywhere, I find that the men are all married.  Or really short.  But let me clarify my last point, height doesn’t matter THAT much to me although my last relationship taught me that having someone close to my height was really nice.  I’d prefer to have my next man/boyfriend/lover to be able to gaze longingly into my eyes….

So what do I do?  How can I meet single, taller men?  Well….I’m choosing Match.com.  Last week I uploaded my profile and crossed my fingers.  I tried Match years ago and was disappointed.  I got tons of ‘winks’ from very old men and extremely short men.  Nothing against either, but definitely not what I was looking for.  Maybe it was a good lesson for me because now I have low expectations and high hopes.

One of my profile pictures. Will it snag me a date? Wait and see!

So far I’ve gotten more than enough uninteresting ‘winks’.  I mean seriously, do men read my ‘what I’m looking for’ section and then think, “Ah, she’ll make an exception for me!  I may be 5’5″ and 66 years old but she’s definitely going to fall for me!”  When I wrote that I was looking for men between 28 and 45, I really meant that.  And when I wrote that I was looking for men over 6’2″, I meant that as well.  I like self-confidence in a man but too much is not a good look on anyone.

So here I go….wading out into the seemingly uncrowded dating pool.  Will I be lucky in love?  I’ll keep you updated periodically as I continue this journey.  Wish me luck!  Keep reading to find out more…..  😉

GIANT SMASH!!!

Remember when you were a kid and you used to pretend you could crush things with your fingers? Many do it as a relaxation technique I heard from a very important doctor I just made up. Take for example Mr. Potato Head. I just take my fingers and crush him between them. Go ahead, just do it. It’ll make you feel powerful.

Feel better? It’s soothing to destroy, isn’t it? Now imagine you’re a giant! Mere fingers aren’t sufficient! Would King Kong use fingers? Would Gozilla use his…. uh, scaly things…. finger scales?…. would Yao Ming destroy with out completely demolishing something from existence? I SAY NO!!!

That is why giants use nothing less than their fists to destroy. Take for example this young man:

Let’s call him Karel, say his little blonde boy hair is pissing me off because I’m going bald and I’m 1/4 Dutch, but he’s full Dutch with a full head of hair. So let’s take our left hand like so:

Then you take your right hand like so:

And like so, you smash the little dutch boy’s head:

Don’t you feel better now that Karel’s gone? 🙂 You’re not stressed, you have asserted your height dominance upon yet another upstart that was trying to take your cookie possibly perhaps and King Kong no longer has anything on you. BLIZOW!!!