So you think you’re tall? And special? Why….yes!

That’s Neri (my upstairs neighbor in front!). See, I AM that much taller!

Yeah, I think I’m tall too. At least I think I’m taller than most women until last night when I went to a movie.  Let me re-phrase that.  I went to a movie with my shorter neighbors (sorry guys, but you are shorter than me).  We decided to go see Dark Knight Rising since we had some Groupons or Living Social Deals that were about to expire.  We get to the theater and while Randy waited out in the hall Neri, Leah, and I made a trip to the ladies room prior to the show and that’s where I saw her.  She was probably my height or maybe, just maybe, a smidge taller than me!  Say what!

We met eyes in the mirror, then quickly looked away.  Then just as quickly we met eyes again.  I felt as though we were doing that weird guy/girl dance of flirting, but we weren’t.  We were sizing each other up but trying to appear as though we weren’t.  You see, that’s what us tall girls do.  It’s so rare to be able to look someone of our same sex in the eye that we want to stare but we don’t want to be caught!

I looked her up and down trying to determine where she got her height.  Was she all legs?  Torso?  Properly or weirdly proportioned?  How did she dress?  Does she like being tall?  Did she stand up straight?  Should I talk to her?  Should I mention ‘our’ heights?  I wonder if she’s looking at me?  Should I smile?  Oh, this is awkward!

She washed her hands while I was still waiting in line and as she passed I stood up a little straighter and tried to catch her eye.  I didn’t say anything to her and I don’t think she would’ve wanted me to.  She walked with a little hunch in her shoulders as if she didn’t like her height and she didn’t even glance up as she walked past.  Too bad, I wanted to give her a big smile.

I wanted to shout out to her, ‘Stand up straight!  Embrace your height!  You are special!  Let your height make the world notice you but make the world love you because of YOU!

*Sigh*

I won’t get on my soapbox about this topic because then I’ll rant and rave about how awesome and amazing it is to be tall.   But I will tell a little story about the picture below:

I toast all you TALL women out there!

This picture was taken on my 39th birthday this year.  A friend of mine was visiting from Iowa and I took her to the drag show at Darcelle’s in Portland, OR.  Why am I toasting?  I felt amazing that night!  And here’s why:  I’m tall and I felt beautiful.  I bought the dress from Long Tall Sally and the little sweater cover-up as well.  When I walked into the room at Darcelle’s and while we were being seated, I had multiple drag queens ask me where I got my clothes!  I don’t think you can get a higher compliment than that.  So you can see, my night started out with an ego boost and my night only got better from there.

The point is, whatever you’ve got whether it’s height, beautiful hair, great eyebrows….whatever, you’ve got to make the most of it.  Regardless.  You’ll feel beautiful, you’ll radiate beauty and everyone wins.

Okay, I did end up on my soapbox.  Getting down now….

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Time to start losing body parts

It’s always funny to me when I read about people complaining about tall people.

“At Newark, my girlfriend had the misfortune of several tall people blocking her view and it made her seriously cranky through much of the show.” – this blog

“….The person in front of the person in front of me was also too darned tall. So the guy in front of me had to shift in his seat to see around the person in front of him. (Is this clear? I could draw a diagram.) So when the guy two rows down shifted to the right, the guy in front of me moved to the left. So whichever way I moved, I was basically blocked.” that blog (which happens to be a blog for the San Francisco Chronicle)

For some reason, a lot of what comes up on my google alert for “tall people”, “tall person” is complaints about how our height is generally impeding the joy of your everyday life. How much it must suck to go to show, fit in perfectly in the seat without your knees bumping against the front of it or people, when they first sit down SLAMMING into their seat and hitting your knees as if the back of their seat were a baseball bat? I mean, who wants that right? Not me.

I’d like to take a moment to apologize to shorter people. I’m sorry that I cannot lop my head off so that you have a clear view of a stage in a space where the architect was clearly not considering that anyone in the world is taller than say 6′-0″.

I’d also like to apologize that I have no choice in the matter and cannot magically grow shorter. If I could, believe me, on occasion I would. And quite frankly, I would also like the power to be able to change into any ethnicity cause I gotta tell ya, you think it’s bad when YOU go to Chinatown, you should see what it’s like when I go to Chinatown.

So… yeah….

PS: I prefer to keep this blog upbeat and fun, but honestly, kids, if you’re averaged sized, shut up. The world is made for you. Not me, nor my friends at the other end of the spectrum. Even my Nemesis….. NEMESIS I WILL DESTROY YOU!!!!

Don’t let her cuteness fool you. She’s a wicked adversary.
She killed my puppy… well, I’m sure she would if I had one….shut up